Maui Wowee

For the past week, Julia and I have been on the beautiful island of Maui, one of the Hawaiian Islands for those of you who never paid attention in history class. If you have never been, its amazing here. Hawaii is certainly not overrated, with crystal clear, blue green water and lush tropical vegetation. It is, quite literally, an Island Paradise.

I jumped off this waterfall a few times (although my friend Steven--standing on top of the falls in this picture-- dove and looked much more graceful than my fat-ass), and the drive from Wailea to Hana was perhaps the most beautiful drive I have ever taken. The only problem was the one lane road and the morons driving in front of us. They had to have been from the great state of Pennsylvania.

The water is incredible. I've never seen anything so blue! The waves are big, although it is summer now, so they get 4x bigger in the winter. I just could not imagine... they seem pretty big to me now. If you want my advice, take the drive to Hana if you come here and see the Hawaii you hear about and see in the movies.

The hotel had a great corral reef right of the beach. Every evening the sun set behind the Island of Lanai to the West... spectacular! I took pictures of sunset almost everyday at dusk. Not to mention pictures of the scuba-meca of little Molokini just to the south. Everywhere I've been, there has been something awe-inspiring. At this rate, I should be a professional photographer in a few months.

But, there is one thing that leaves a blemish, although a small one; all of the abandon cars on the side of the roads. You can't drive 15 minutes in any direction with out passing a rusted or burned-out wreck. Most were covered with graffiti and all of them were missing their rear-wheels. Seriously, we must have passed 10 junkers on the 52 mile drive to Hana. But, there was a silver-lining. Not only did the beauty of the island and the sites along the way make up for abandon autos...

...someone abandoned their old, dirty volvo. An island paradise, beautiful scenery, crystal-clear water, and plenty of places to dump your used volvo. What more could you ask for?

The End of the Summer Doldrums

Its mid-August, loyal readers, and it has been quite a summer. It has been a summer of highs and lows; good and bad. Actually, it's been one crazy roller coaster after another. My stomach is a mess! But, I think things happen for a reason. I think you deal with what life throws at you the best you can and the rewards come when you least expect it. If you couldn't handle it, god wouldn't put you thru it, you know?

The weather is great here in Northern California, and things are calming back down. After such a trying summer, I can not think of a better time to start ranting again about all the things that I treasure so dearly; like how I finally bit the bullet and signed up for a fantasy football league. Or how I get to go to Hawaii for the first time, or how the NFL regular season is just around the corner. That's when I get to root-root-root for my Beloved Redskins yet again!

That's right, everyone, football season is just around the corner. Training camps are in full swing, players and coaches are refining their systems, preseason games have already begun... and big name players are already falling by the wayside. Clinton Portis, Curtis Martin, Terrell Owens and Steve Smith all have injuries that may threaten to keep them out the beginning of the season.

Not to mention all the players getting arrested or suspended. The Browns center Alonzo Ephraim was suspended for 4 games for violating the leagues drug policy. Vikings receiver Koren Robinson was arrested for Driving While Intoxicated after he refused to pull over when police clocked him doing 100 mph. (Robinson had similar problems in Seattle that threatened his career. Seems like they didn't clear up the way the Vikings had hoped.) Not to mention all of the Bengals who have been locked up over the summer. Looks like the police and doctors are going to busy again this year, huh?

Now that the usual shenanigans are underway, I do have one gripe. Why the hell is no one mentioning the Redskins as a favorite to go deep into the playoffs? Seriously! This year they have better depth, a better offensive coordinator, no LaVar distraction and two speedy receivers to complement an offense that already has Chris Cooley, Clinton Portis and Santana Moss--the latter two who set single-season Redskin records in yards for a running back and receiver, respectively. Mark Brunell has seen better days, but with more weapons to throw to and Cooley as his safety valve, I think this year's version of the Redskins will have a much more potent offense, will put up more points than last year and their defense will shut people down. I'm not necessarily saying Super Bowl, but they will go further than last year. Mark my words. (If you know me, my record as a prognosticator is about as reliable as a Norv Turner-coached team facing a must win game. Bet at your own risk.)

With pre-season football now in full swing, it can only mean one thing... Hockey training camp starts in 6 weeks! Hallelujah!! Can't everyone feel the excitement? Haven't you all been as miserable as I've been since the Caps failed to make the playoffs and the Sharks lost to the Oilers in the first round? Does your heart ache and mind wander in this hockeyless void we fans call summer? Do any of you even know what I'm talking about? How many of you actually know which cities the three teams I just mentioned play their home games? If you don't know at least one city, then you will have to deal with God's wrath on your own. I won't help you... Pitiful.

I can't wait to see The Big O this year and I wonder what he will do to makes us jump out of our seats this winter. I can not wait to see if your Nation's Capitals are any better this year after finishing much better than they began. I wonder if Carolina can repeat as Cup champs? I wonder if Joe Thornton will shrug off the playoff curse and take the Sharks deep into the playoffs. I wonder how long it will take Jaromir Jagr to start bitching and moaning this year?


(Remember last year? I said after the Rangers started the season on a torrid pace that it was only a matter of time before they collapsed and Jagr would start to whine and pout. Well, the Boys in Blue fell apart in the second half, lost in the first round of the playoffs and the former-Penguin defended himself by pointing out he finished second in the regular season in points and goals. He didn't have much to show for in the playoffs when it counted, however. I give him until late January before he starts moaning about his coach, his teammates or both. And that's giving him more time than I actually believe it will take.)

Useless Rants

• Kudos to the Washington Nationals top-brass for not trading Alfonso Soriano at the trade deadline. I understand the temptation to trade your best player for young talent in an effort to build for the future, but except for one incident in Spring Training--when Soriano refused to play left field in a meaningless exhibition game--Number 12 has been the Nationals best player. He is on pace for 40 steals, a .290 average and he has a shot to be the first Washington baseball player to hit 50 homeruns. Ever. The fans love him, his teammates love him and he insists that he wants to stay in the city. The front-office needs to sign him in the off-season before he hits the open market as a free-agent. That way, they can keep fannies in the seats, attract a better class of free agents and sell tickets to that new stadium that the city and baseball are still squabbling over. If they can't re-sign Soriano, the two-first round picks they would receive for him signing elsewhere would still bolster the Nats depleted farm system. Seems like a win-win situation to me.
  
• Its mid-August, and Terrell Owens is already making waves. He's hurt right now (pulled hamstring); he says he has let go of the past--yet still keeps ripping Eagles QB Donovan McNabb, Eagles head coach Andy Reid and the Eagles whenever he does an interview; and Coach Parcells is starting to get pissy about all the hub-bub over his temperamental wide-out. Hey, Tuna! How bad do you think it's gonna be when T.O. starts complaining on the sidelines and after games about what a jerk you are and how he needs the ball more? You thought ME-Shawn was a handful... Just wait until you get a load of T.O., which you loyal readers will remember stands for "Totally Obnoxious".
  
  
• Its August, like I said before, and I see things have returned to normal in Red Sox Nation. After leading the AL East for most of the year, the Red Sox currently sit second behind (SURPRISE!) the surging New York Yankees. This has happened every year since 1918. Except, of course, for the 2004 season, which we all now know was a hiccup in the normal tradition of the Boston Red Sox. I wish it were not true, but I'm afraid it is. Damn Yankees.
  
• Isiah Thomas fired Larry Brown (the coach who has won everywhere he coached, even when he was with the Clippers, for god's sake!) after last year because the Knicks were terrible. How could a team with Eddie Curry (bad heart), Stephon Marbury (no heart), and Stevie Francis (no brain) ever lose? To fix the problem, Thomas signed Jared Jeffries away from the Wizards. Last time I looked, Jeffries was a good defender but couldn't make a lay-up to save a season. Who's letting Isiah run the show in the Big Apple anyway? Someone needs their head checked. Isiah Thomas has a track record: as a player, he was great. As a GM, he stinks. I don't mean "not good" stinks, I mean "raw sewage, septic tank uncleaned for 20 years" stink. And believe me, I now what that smells like.