Godzilla, Hobbits and What Real Woman Want

Monday November 10th was a bitter sweet day for Cap Fans. The Caps won led 3-0 after the first, Ovie broke his 9 game goal less drought with a 3rd period tally and they manhandled the Lightning 4-2. The Caps did not give up a goal on the first shot of the game for once and Brent Johnson was stellar in net yet again. However, the bitter part was seeing Olie Kolzig dressed in the silver, black, blue, purple and mullet colors of Tampa Bay. This was not how we all envisioned Godzilla's tenure in DC ending, I am sure, wearing the uniform of a division rival. But that is indeed what has taken place and many of us at the game wrestled with conflicting emotions we have never felt before.

I was nervous before the game, as were many of the fans I saw Monday as my wife and I found our seats and waited for the puck to drop. I have seen athletes come and go over the years, but this was different. I have never seen the former face of a DC franchise play on the opposite side after meaning so much to the city, the organ-eye-zation, and the fans. Watching Kolzig in the away white was disturbing and sad. It was like seeing Darrel Green in a Giants or (gag) Cowboy uniform. The closest thing we have experienced around here that I can equate it to would be Mike Mussina playing for the Yankees. But Mussina left on his own to join a winner. Olie was pushed aside and he left because he was no longer wanted.

Godzilla was supposed to hoist the Cup here and then retire as a life-long Capital. He was the guy that asked not to be traded, who wanted to stay after the fire sale in 04. He signed a two year extention for less money to stay here during the rebuilding of 05-07. The same guy who bleed every colors the Caps have ever worn. Management didn't even have the heart to show Olie the doorafter last season, so they left him hanging and ultimately gave him no choice but to leave on his own. Someone with Olie's class and professionalism deserved more after being with the franchise since he was 18 years old. He holds virtually every goal tending record in Washington. This was how we repaid him?

Watching the Caps go up 3-0 was hard to watch. I mean, I loved that we didn't give up a goal on the first shot of the first period. I love when the young guys contribute. (Eric Fehr's one-timer was a thing of beauty.) But watching Olie fall behind was painful for a lot of us in the arena. I was upset watching him give up three first period goals and then I realized that the Caps were still winning. Huh? That couldn't right. Check the scoreboard again. Oh, right. He doesn't play for us anymore. What?

The crowd stood and cheered when management showed a video tribute to #37 and all he accomplished in Washington. He looked like he tried to ignore it for the first 20 seconds, but eventually looked up at the Jumbotron before waving his stick in the air when he skated back out to the goal. It was hard to make sense of it all; our long stalwart in the wrong net, taking orders from "The Mullet" instead of Gabby. I was emotional, as were many of us, but I did not cry. (Shocker! I bet 2-1 I would sob like a baby.) But after awhile, we fell into the normal routine. Olie became the other teams netminder for the rest of the game. He settled down and played well after the tribute, as if remembering how great he has played in this building and finding the old rhythm. Caps win! Olie loses. I don't know if I can get used to that or not.

There will come a day when I take my kids to the Verizon Center and teach them the game of hockey. Teach them the rules, the positions, the players names. I will instruct them when to cheer and when to clap, who Horn-Guy and Goat are and the words to "The Hockey Song". Eventually, they will ask me about the numbers hanging in the rafters and what they mean. It will be with great pride that after I tell them about Labre, Gartner, Hunter and Langway, I will explain that Olie Kolzig was the greatest goalie to ever play hockey in Washington. I will tell them that he was the Washington Capitals and no one else who ever has put on the uniform has garnered more respect, love and admiration than #37. I hope I can tell them that I was there, with tears in my eyes, the day they hung his number high above the ice.

Seen at Verizon Center

While walking the concourse looking for a concession stand that sells veggie burgers, we passed a woman with a sign that said:

"Real Women Love Semin!"

Classic...

Face off in the Shire

My brother and I act like we are perpetually 12 years old. We find many things to laugh at that most people do not. However, Drew and I have stumbled onto a subject many of you may find amusing. That would be short hockey players. There are few in the league under the normal six foot mark that are damn good. But there are some who are damn good that we can not stand. This hatred took on a life of its own that eventually bore fruit during Monday's Caps/Lightning game.

See, last year during the Caps/Flyers playoff series, Drew expressed his disdain for Daniel Briere of the Flyers. I concurred. We started to make fun of him until Drew called him, "Daniel Baggins", and a "hobbit" because of Briere's smaller stature. (He's generously listed at 5'10"). After watching the Caps beat Olie and the Bolts, I realized how much I hate Martin St. Louis. Then came the idea:

Introducing the All Hobbit Line!

The rules are they have to be under 5'10" and they have to be dicks.

Center: Daniel Briere (aka Daniel Baggins, 5'10" 179) - He plays for the Flyers, cries like a little baby and still hasn't gotten over a boarding call from Ovechkin back in Decmeber of 06. Briere fits right in up in "The City of Brotherly Shove", with all of the other Vince Paple wanna-bes. Talk about Napolean complex, I think the whole city has one because they aren't New York. Hey Baggins, go back to the Shire!

Right Wing: Martin St Louis (aka Bilbo St. Louis 5'9" 177) - He plays for Tampa, has never regained his form from the one good season he had when the Lightning won the Cup in 04. Bil-blow is prone to whining because he realizes he is overrated. How can a team with all this talent and "The Mullet" behind the bench be this bad?

Left Wing: Derek Roy (aka Frodo Roy 5'9" 188) - He plays for Lindey Ruff in Buffalo, which Drew says automatically makes him a dick. Like his coach, he likes to complain when things take a turn for the worse. He took Daniel Baggins place in Buffalo after Briere left the Shire. Frodo doesn't even pronounce his name the French-Canadian way, which makes him a poser.

Honorable Mention:
-Steve Sullivan 5'8" 165 - plays for Nashville. We seem to remember hearing he is a jerk but can not verify.
-Sergei Samsonov 5'8 188 - Supposed to be good, but he sucks. Don't know if whines. Apparently he has no emotions what so ever. No passion either. Good candidate for the "All Vulcan" Team
-Nigel Dawes 5'9 193 - His name is Nigel, for christsake! Do I need to say any more? Nigel just reeks of some pale, stuck up Brit whining about how they let us win the Revolution. Dawes isn't British, but his parents apparently didn't get the memo on that one.

If you have a nomination for The All Shire team, in any sport, do not hesiate to email me or leave your comment. We appreciate your participation!